We had a prompt in our writing group to write about our worst date. This is my attempt to tell a mostly true story about a date I had years ago.

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Two score and four years afar.
 I met a girl in a disco bar.
This lovely lass was oh so pretty.
Young a wise and very witty.

We danced to the Bee Gee’s Staying’ Alive.
She liked my moves. She dug my vibes.
Then wouldn’t you know it. It was just my luck.
She got down and waddled to Disco Duck.

Her dancing was hotter than a can of Sterno.
When the deejay spun Disco Inferno.
I thought to myself, it really seems.
I’d found the girl from my wildest dreams.

I got up the nerve and asked her out.
She said yes. I gave a shout.
I said I was free on Saturday.
She told me Saturday was a busy day.

She had an early job interview downtown.
But she didn’t have a car to get around.
It was an all-day affair with the L.A. Police.
If she could get there on time, in one piece.

I told her I’d pick her up before eight.
Drive her to the academy so she wouldn’t be late.
I’d come back before five and I’d sit there and wait.
Then I’d take her on our first date.

She lived with her aunt, on Second Street.
Only two miles from my one-room suite.
I wanted to show her that she need not despair.
 I arrived on her street with ten minutes to spare.

I waited outside for thirty minutes or more.
I never saw her walk out of the door.
I looked to see if she’d gone astray.
I didn’t want to be the cause of delay.

How long would I sit in my car and wait?
Did she skip out on our very first date?
I saw a street sign and let out a foul word.
I was one block over, sitting on Third.

I sped around the corner and stopped by her house.
Feeling as low as a lowdown louse.
I explained my demise as I opened her door.
I’ll still get you there and your faith I’ll restore.

I drove like crazy at a swift tempo.
Pulled up to the academy with mere minutes to go.
Work hard at the academy. I’m sure you’ll survive.
I’ll be back there to meet you no later than five.

I did arrive early. No way I’d be late.
I didn’t want to screw up our first date.
I picked her up as I said I would do.
Then took her out to dinner for two.

We had a fine meal and laughed over wine.
She told me her story and I told her mine.
The evening was splendid; we had a great night.
Our future together was looking quite bright.

We walked back to my car but to my dismay.
One more time I’d lead her astray.
I’d left my lights on. The battery was dead.
I could tell my presence she’d started to dread.

It took an hour to get on the road.
It was midnight when we reached her abode.
She said a quick goodnight as she ran from my car.
By the time I responded, she was quite far.

So much for the first date. The next would be better.
Next time, I’d be a real go-getter.
But alas, I turned out to be a bird-brain.
For I never say the young lass again.